“Sea-Sickness,” a “Sea-Fever” Parody by Arthur Guiterman

Here’s a fun parody of this blog and my company’s namesake, Sea-Fever by John Masefield.

I must go down to the seas again, where the billows romp and reel,
So all I ask is a large ship that rides on an even keel,
And a mild breeze and a broad deck with a slight list to leeward,
And a clean chair in a snug nook and a nice, kind steward.

I must go down to the seas again, the sport of wind and tide,
As the grey wave and the green wave play leapfrog over the side.
And all I ask is a glassy calm with a bone-dry scupper,
A good book and a warm rug and a light, plain supper.

I must go down to the seas again, though there I’m a total loss,
And can’t say which is worst: the pitch, the plunge, the roll, the toss.
But all I ask is a safe retreat in a bar well tended,
And a soft berth and a smooth course till the long trip’s ended.

Arthur_Guiterman (1871-1943)

According to Wikipedia, Guiterman was an American writer best known for his humorous poems.  He was born of American parents in Vienna, graduated from the College of the City of New York in 1891, and was married in 1909 to Vida Lindo. He was an editor of the Woman’s Home Companion and the Literary Digest. In 1910, he cofounded the Poetry Society of America, and later served as its president in 1925-26.

Poets’ Opportunities Greater than Ever Before; Arthur Guiterman Tells How to Make a Living Out of Verse and Gives a List of Don’ts for Aspiring Poets ;- Advises Writing on Topical Themes (PDF) New York Times, November 28, 1915